I wrote the following story for a friend's art project this semester at graduate school. The theme was "It was only a moment, but it changed everything."
I am not afraid of car crashes. People always say that the likelihood of dying in a car accident is much greater than dying in a plane crash, but people in plane crashes perish at a rate of 99.9% (unless you are on Lost, where the soft ocean cushions your fall, then the ratio falls to 84%). This is not why I'm not afraid of car crashes, and in fact, any logical, reasonable answer you could think of would also be incorrect. I am not afraid of car crashes because I have an invisible shield of protection around me (the reason for it's magical existence is up in the air, but I suspect wizardry of some sort).
I have been in two fairly significant car crashes, but only one changed everything. This car crash is really about a girl (because the two are very closely associated) and a realization that comes from having your life explode onto a highway in the middle of winter. She and I had had "a thing." The type of relationship that only happens to love struck boys who are not so secretly in love with their best friend. I wasn't completely crazy, we dated, just not seriously, because of her inevitable "last relationship." The casualness of our relationship was apparent to only her; her friends and roommates swore we were going out, every waking hour was hanging out, just the two of us, making each other dinner and planning trips together.
So it was the fruition of one of these trips where this moment occurred. The two of us, woke up before the sun even rose one December morning to drive down to Florida, a 12 hour trip, to spend the Christmas holiday with her family (I hope now, you see my romantic confusion). It was sleeting at 6 AM, and being from Florida, she had no idea how to drive in the sleet. I offered to drive and she stuck to her stubborn self. It was only 20 miles later that her maroon Suzuki Grand Vitara went careening across four lanes of major highway. It was the ice caked on the wipers that caused the accident, wiping away sleet with ice picks never works. She decided to pull over, to remove the ice from the wipers and the moment happened.
Three lanes of traffic were no match for the sporty SUV, it was the fourth that was the problem. As we slid diagonally across the highway, I noticed a semi tractor trailer at our 2 o'clock. I had seen this before, the car slides under a tractor trailer and its passengers are decapitated. As we slide closer and closer she kept screaming my name out of fear and the possibility that our lives would end together. This made me feel loved. Then we smacked the side of the trailer flush, like a gigantic hand clap, and went spinning back across the highway. It was not over though, the Grand Vitara spun several times, finally pointing its' nose back towards oncoming traffic, and facing another tractor trailer barring down upon us. Luckily, the tractor trailer saw us and slowed down enough that the second hit only gently pushed us backwards.
It was then that everything changed for me. I was no longer the pathetic kid trying to make her love me, I was instinctively holding her and calling her mom at 7 am. I was dealing with the cops and the second truck driver. I was calling her friend to bring us home and figuring out how to get down to Florida anyway. The adrenaline caused me to be someone who was capable of being of loved. This is why I am not afraid of car crashes, they always make you feel more alive after you cheat death.
I have been in two fairly significant car crashes, but only one changed everything. This car crash is really about a girl (because the two are very closely associated) and a realization that comes from having your life explode onto a highway in the middle of winter. She and I had had "a thing." The type of relationship that only happens to love struck boys who are not so secretly in love with their best friend. I wasn't completely crazy, we dated, just not seriously, because of her inevitable "last relationship." The casualness of our relationship was apparent to only her; her friends and roommates swore we were going out, every waking hour was hanging out, just the two of us, making each other dinner and planning trips together.
So it was the fruition of one of these trips where this moment occurred. The two of us, woke up before the sun even rose one December morning to drive down to Florida, a 12 hour trip, to spend the Christmas holiday with her family (I hope now, you see my romantic confusion). It was sleeting at 6 AM, and being from Florida, she had no idea how to drive in the sleet. I offered to drive and she stuck to her stubborn self. It was only 20 miles later that her maroon Suzuki Grand Vitara went careening across four lanes of major highway. It was the ice caked on the wipers that caused the accident, wiping away sleet with ice picks never works. She decided to pull over, to remove the ice from the wipers and the moment happened.
Three lanes of traffic were no match for the sporty SUV, it was the fourth that was the problem. As we slid diagonally across the highway, I noticed a semi tractor trailer at our 2 o'clock. I had seen this before, the car slides under a tractor trailer and its passengers are decapitated. As we slide closer and closer she kept screaming my name out of fear and the possibility that our lives would end together. This made me feel loved. Then we smacked the side of the trailer flush, like a gigantic hand clap, and went spinning back across the highway. It was not over though, the Grand Vitara spun several times, finally pointing its' nose back towards oncoming traffic, and facing another tractor trailer barring down upon us. Luckily, the tractor trailer saw us and slowed down enough that the second hit only gently pushed us backwards.
It was then that everything changed for me. I was no longer the pathetic kid trying to make her love me, I was instinctively holding her and calling her mom at 7 am. I was dealing with the cops and the second truck driver. I was calling her friend to bring us home and figuring out how to get down to Florida anyway. The adrenaline caused me to be someone who was capable of being of loved. This is why I am not afraid of car crashes, they always make you feel more alive after you cheat death.
