Saturday, May 24, 2008

The Time I Went to Elon Graduation 2008

so please excuse the grammar and punctuation of this post. I am truly live blogging from the unsunny town of Elon today. so let the games begin. 8:00 am - wake up time. i find tha the weather is 56 and rainy, sounds like a great day for sitting under a bunch of trees. In case you were wondering, i am going to this graduation to collect money from a friend who now lives in guam, I feel like an OG. 831 am - i feel pretty excited to walk a mile in the rain with no sidewalk and a line of cars watching me walk. i cant say ive ever tried before, but i feel like walking next to cars that are backed up bumper to bumper is an awkward experience. (you take 10 seconds to walk by a car then the car drives by you and stops. repeat). 839 am - I feel like a real tv character from a shitty sitcom who is waiting for his wife to get ready "! want to wear my sundress in the 56 degree weather." Me: "you'll be cold." "then what should I wear?" "...." the upside 3 minutes later is you get to see her naked several times. Take that and CBS sitcom husband. 945 - long story short i jut typed a whole essay about how i was disappointed that there was no free food (because the wait staff took it away before the event even started) but i accidentally deleted it. someone just prayed on stage but im about a kilometer away (way more than a stones throw). kill me. 952 am - the president ( of the senior class) speaks. im already half way to running to the nearest open flame. 1000 am - the school president, leo, introduces the speaker and uses 'meet the fockers' as a career defining piece. i cant tell you how hiliarious it is to have an old man say focker (laced with sarcasm). at this point i wonder why i even came. 1007 am - this speaker, some douche nozzle former elon student, is in the film industry. all im hearing is how is first job was tough (as an assistant to the assistant) and how good he was at his job. way to toot yourown horn. as a rule of thumb, anyone who worked on the movie "road trip" (yes that DID have Tom Green in it) should never be allowed to speak at a college graduation. 1100 am - after some simple math we determined that we are only 25% of the way thru the graduation and i wasnt about to stay till 1230. thus ends the live blog from elon graduation 2008. disappointed? ! know i am