The Time I Had My First Drink

Many people will be surprised to read that I had my first drink. After years and years of being stubborn and obnoxious about the people around me drinking, I finally shut up and tried alcohol for the first time. The first taste was absolutely disgusting, it tasted somewhere in between the inside of a metal garbage can on the city street and berries. Wine was not for me.

But let's back track a bit. I had been thinking about drinking for months upon months now, I felt that since I was moving to Chicago, it might help to be more social, and since the only reason I WASNT drinking these days was because I hadn't done it in the past, why not at least take a shot. So a week ago, while hanging out with an old friend, I sipped this garbage can wine.

The next day, another friend (of the ex variety) wanted to have my first full drink with me (at the 3 in the afternoon). I felt since I had imbibed just a sip of alcohol, I had gotten over the no alcohol bridge and was ready to go. So we tried "something I might enjoy", a Woodchuck Amber Cider. It was definitely the closest thing to urine I've ever tasted (without ever really tasting urine.) It was absolutely awful, but I got the whole thing down by myself! I had to meet a friend for dinner, so I stopped at one, and made sure there was an hour on the clock before I had to do anything. Extremely overly cautious wouldn't even be strong enough to describe how I felt about drinking. Would there be anything worse than getting a DUI in the middle of the day, the first time you ever drink? (Other than watching "Teen Mom," of course).

Later that night, I was in Philadelphia with another friend (I was on a friend tour) and we decided to go to a bar (my first drink at a bar!). I had what she had, a Sam Adams summer ale, and it was also terrible. I knew I wouldn't enjoy something cheap like Miller Lite or PBR, but I had seen commercials for Sam Adams that included words like "rich" and "lager" and showed manual laborers in Boston really enjoying it. They are all liars. Beer is gross.

We decided to not waste any more money on things I would not enjoy and she thought I would enjoy Smirnoff Ice. So we waited in line, bought a 6 pack of Smirnoff Ice and headed back to her studio apartment to party.

Part 2 tomorrow.